Is Having an Emotional Relationship with AI Adultery?
Marriage
Audio By Carbonatix
By Alicia Searl, Crosswalk.com
If you haven’t noticed, AI is moving in a rather peculiar direction, dare I say, even a dangerous one? As the lines blur between humanity and artificial systems that mimic humans, it’s getting harder to decipher what is “real.” Just scroll through your social media, and you will easily come across posts, pictures, and statements that appear real, but are actually generated by AI. Essentially, these images and videos are designed to draw us in, capture our attention, and toy with our emotions. Of course, this is going to affect our real relationships and how we correspond with other humans.
But perhaps the most alarming issue is the huge uptick in AI's meddling in the most sacred of human relationships—the union of a husband and wife. As updates are rolling out at operational speed and tech and all the various devices are becoming more human and life-like, it has become commonplace to hear about the infatuation of digital affairs.
However, that may not even be the worst part! As more marriages are being tempted by the lure of emotional AI “beings,” the question remains: Is having an emotional relationship with AI adultery?
Well, before we address that question, let’s dig into a few underlying issues first. More importantly, let’s seek wisdom from what God has to say on this subject and how we can use discernment to protect our marriages. Buckle up, friends, this may get a bit intense, but as believers, we must not shy away from these topics; we must gain insight into how to approach them with truth and conviction.
The Social Dilemma That Has Led Us to the Lonely Epidemic
While we all go through seasons of loneliness, the surge of universal loneliness and social isolation has shifted our society to a very different place on the emotional spectrum. The Harvard Graduate School of Education recently did a study on how loneliness has evolved over the last four years, and the data is staggering.
Here are some of the stats:
-21% of adults currently experience extreme bouts of loneliness, with people between the ages of 30-44 being hit the hardest.
-Both men and women are experiencing loneliness equally.
-Loneliness is being linked to mental health concerns.
-73% of those surveyed admitted that technology was the biggest factor in their loneliness.
While many attribute this surge of loneliness to the pandemic and recent events, one of the top factors remains the swift shifts in technology and the decline of in-person communication.
Temptations Drawing Couples to “Virtual” Infidelity
We have now reached a pivotal point where a lonely society is desperately searching for connection and clumsily finding it behind a screen. For many, these devices feel like a “safe” way to share feelings and gain emotional support, without judgment. This is playing out in marriages in a myriad of ways. But, while the actions seem harmless enough, the truth is that these interactions are causing grave consequences.
While AI can quickly deliver validation, gratification, a space to be vulnerable, and dopamine intimacy, it is all a façade. It is an illusion. It’s nothing more than a false sense of reality, merely fueling the loneliness epidemic.
Using AI as a virtual partner is possibly one of the sneakiest tricks from the enemy. After all, it’s a temptation with a shiny exterior, but it comes with so many emotional strings attached, including addiction, manipulation, disillusionment, and essentially substituting real relationships for “artificial” engagement.
What Does the Bible Say about Adultery?
Exodus 20:14 says that we should not commit adultery. Marriage should be honored and sexually pure (Hebrews 13:4). And anyone who commits adultery is only hurting themselves (Proverbs 6:32). According to Jesus, we are not to even look at another with lustful eyes, as it is sinful (Matthew 5:27-28).
In a healthy marriage, intimacy is generally exchanged physically, mentally, spiritually, and emotionally. A husband and wife who submit to Christ first (Ephesians 5:21) learn how to love, honor, and serve their spouse through connecting in ways that build trust and resilience. In other words, they depend solely on God to love one another in this “sacred” way. Anything outside of that context is basically asking for trouble and inviting the enemy to intervene.
Is Falling in Love with a “Human System” Really the Same as Having an Affair?
So, what constitutes as adultery?
Anything that dishonors your spouse and goes outside the covenant of marriage, which states that a holy union brought together by God should never be separated by “man” (Matthew 19:6). This separation includes any form of physical, mental, spiritual, or emotional “intimate” connection outside of the confines of marriage.
Does this infidelity include AI?
When any form of intimacy is missing between a husband and wife, such as the emotional connection, which just so happens to be the most neglected area, it slowly opens the door for an emotionally depleted or disconnected spouse to seek validation and understanding in other ways. AI often becomes an easy “go-to” and fills that void. Yet that doesn’t make it right.
Is seeking AI emotional support really the same as having a human emotional affair?
The problem is that, while it may not be considered an emotional affair because it isn’t with another person, it still involves intimate and emotional connections with someone (or something) other than one’s spouse.
In the end, yes, falling in love or having an emotional affair with AI is damaging to a marriage, could cause devastating impacts, and goes against God’s holy design. According to God's view and honor of marriage, we are to uphold our union with dignity and strive to keep it honest, pure, and sacred through our actions, words, and deeds.
How to Protect Your Marriage
Whether your marriage has been infiltrated by AI, is toying with the idea, or wants nothing to do with it, as believers, we must put wise measures in place. Creating safe boundaries around our marriages and protecting them from the sneaky threats these systems bring is imperative in this day and age.
Start by opening up a conversation with your spouse and discussing what is on your heart. Use the questions below to guide you.
- How much AI do you typically use in a day? For work, free time, or other?
- Do you ever share feelings or thoughts with AI? If so, why do you feel the need to do so?
- Do your interactions with AI honor Christ and our marriage?
If these questions make you or your spouse uncomfortable or feel uneasy, it may be time to put stricter boundaries in place to protect your union. Start with simple adjustments, such as setting time limits or restrictions on your phone/devices, and make sure to connect and communicate as a couple daily. Seek wise counsel from trusted brothers or sisters or a professional if needed. And, finally, be sure to share your struggles with the Lord and seek His wisdom, discernment, and guidance as you move forward.
A Prayer for Your Marriage
Father God, thank You for the beautiful blessing and gift of marriage. Today, I lift up the couple or spouse who earnestly wants to protect their marriage and keep it safe from any outside predators, including AI. I ask that You place a bold hedge of protection around their union and give them hearts that long to connect with one another in deep and meaningful ways. Allow them to honor, serve, and love one another through intimate encounters that embrace every facet of connection. Give them the heart to see their spouse the way You do and to submit to Your will with humble obedience. In Jesus' name. Amen.
Related:
3 Sneaky Ways AI Is Damaging Marriages
How to Handle Spiritual Attacks on Your Marriage
3 Ways to Build a Marriage That Can Withstand a Crisis
Photo credit: ©GettyImages/EmirMemedovski
Alicia Searl is a devotional author, blogger, and speaker that is passionate about pouring out her heart and pointing ladies of all ages back to Jesus. She has an education background and master’s in literacy. Her favorite people call her Mom, which is why much of her time is spent cheering them on at a softball game or dance class. She is married to her heartthrob (a tall, spiky-haired blond) who can whip up a mean latte. She sips that goodness while writing her heart on a page while her puppy licks her feet. Visit her website at aliciasearl.com and connect with her on Instagram and Facebook.
