The Silent Treatment - I Do Every Day - September 16

I Do Every Day

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The Silent Treatment
By Lisa Lakey

I’m not talking to you.

Of course, I didn’t actually say those words out loud because they would have ruined my plan of strategically giving my husband the silent treatment.

We were both exhausted from another pointless argument. Neither side was giving in, getting less angry, or even willing to consider the other’s point of view. Sadly, the equivalent of a child’s post-temper tantrum attitude was all I had left to hold onto.

And I held it (along with my tongue) fiercely.

It’s dumb, I know. But we’ve all done it, right? We think, they’ll “hear” us through our silence, dang it!

I don’t know about you, but this has never actually worked in my favor. When I get tired of the silent treatment one of two things happens:

1. The argument is still there waiting for us.
2. We ignore the issue altogether, allowing it to fester until it rears its ugly head again. (And y’all, it will.)

So what’s an angry spouse to do? First, let’s all just chill out. The same anger that leads me to silence can also lead me to say things I regret. Walking away, taking a break, getting a cool breath of fresh air is often all that’s needed to de-escalate the tension.

It’s not the same as the silent treatment or ignoring an argument, because our plan is to lead into this next step—coming back together.

When we have both calmed down, we talk about what happened. Like grown-ups. We can respectfully take turns listening and speaking. No, we might not always agree on a solution. But we can at least make a plan to resolve the tension or find a middle ground. And I’m okay with that. Because my relationship with my husband is more valuable than being right.

The silent treatment isn’t about holding my tongue. It’s about holding onto my pride.

Is your home emotionally healthy? Here are five ways to identify dysfunction and healthy ways to move forward.

The Good Stuff: For the anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God. (James 1:20)

Action Points: What topics need to be addressed that you have been avoiding because they lead to arguing? Pray together and ask God to show you both where you can find middle ground.

I Do Every Day Let’s Go Vertical! prayer guide

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This content first appeared on Crosswalk.com and is used here with permission. To view the original visit: https://www.crosswalk.com/devotionals/momentstogether/moments-with-you-couples-devotional-9-or-16-555278.html
 

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Larry Elder is an American lawyer, writer, and radio and television personality who calls himself the "Sage of South Central" a district of Los Angeles, Larry says his philosophy is to entertain, inform, provoke and to hopefully uplift. His calling card is "we have a country to save" and to him this means returning to the bedrock Constitutional principles of limited government and maximum personal responsibility. Elder's iconoclastic wit and intellectual agility makes him a particularly attractive voice in a nation that seems weary of traditional racial dialogue.” – Los Angeles Times.

Mike Gallagher Mike Gallagher began his broadcasting career in 1978 in Dayton, Ohio. Today, he is one of the most listened-to talk radio show hosts in America, recently having been ranked in the Talkers Magazine “Heavy Hundred” list – the 100 most important talk radio hosts in America. Prior to being launched into national syndication in 1998, Mike hosted the morning show on WABC-AM in New York City. Today, Talkers Magazine reports that his show is heard by over 3.75 million weekly listeners. Besides his radio work, Mike is seen on Fox News Channel as an on-air contributor, frequently appearing on the cable news giant.

Hugh Hewitt is one of the nation’s leading bloggers and a genuine media revolutionary. He brings that expertise, his wit and what The New Yorker magazine calls his “amiable but relentless manner” to his nationally syndicated show each day.

When Dr. Sebastian Gorka was growing up, he listened to talk radio under his pillow with a transistor radio, dreaming that one day he would be behind the microphone. Beginning New Year’s Day 2019, he got his wish. Gorka now hosts America First every weekday afternoon 3 to 6pm ET. Gorka’s unique story works well on the radio. He is national security analyst for the Fox News Channel and author of two books: "Why We Fight" and "Defeating Jihad." His latest book releasing this fall is “War For America’s Soul.” He is uniquely qualified to fight the culture war and stand up for what is great about America, his adopted home country.

Broadcasting from his home station of KRLA in Los Angeles, the Dennis Prager Show is heard across the country. Everything in life – from politics to religion to relationships – is grist for Dennis’ mill. If it’s interesting, if it affects your life, then Dennis will be talking about it – with passion, humor, insight and wisdom.

Sean Hannity is a conservative radio and television host, and one of the original primetime hosts on the Fox News Channel, where he has appeared since 1996. Sean Hannity began his radio career at a college station in California, before moving on to markets in the Southeast and New York. Today, he’s one of the most listened to on-air voices. Hannity’s radio program went into national syndication on September 10, 2001, and airs on more than 500 stations. Talkers Magazine estimates Hannity’s weekly radio audience at 13.5 million. In 1996 he was hired as one of the original hosts on Fox News Channel. As host of several popular Fox programs, Hannity has become the highest-paid news anchor on television.

Michelle Malkin is a mother, wife, blogger, conservative syndicated columnist, longtime cable TV news commentator, and best-selling author of six books. She started her newspaper journalism career at the Los Angeles Daily News in 1992, moved to the Seattle Times in 1995, and has been penning nationally syndicated newspaper columns for Creators Syndicate since 1999. She is founder of conservative Internet start-ups Hot Air and Twitchy.com. Malkin has received numerous awards for her investigative journalism, including the Council on Governmental Ethics Laws (COGEL) national award for outstanding service for the cause of governmental ethics and leadership (1998), the Reed Irvine Accuracy in Media Award for Investigative Journalism (2006), the Heritage Foundation and Franklin Center for Government & Public Integrity's Breitbart Award for Excellence in Journalism (2013), the Center for Immigration Studies' Eugene Katz Award for Excellence in the Coverage of Immigration Award (2016), and the Manhattan Film Festival's Film Heals Award (2018). Married for 26 years and the mother of two teenage children, she lives with her family in Colorado. Follow her at michellemalkin.com. (Photo reprinted with kind permission from Peter Duke Photography.)

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The Silent Treatment - I Do Every Day - September 16

I Do Every Day

Carbonatix Pre-Player Loader

Audio By Carbonatix

Crosswalk.com

I Do Every Day devotional banner

The Silent Treatment
By Lisa Lakey

I’m not talking to you.

Of course, I didn’t actually say those words out loud because they would have ruined my plan of strategically giving my husband the silent treatment.

We were both exhausted from another pointless argument. Neither side was giving in, getting less angry, or even willing to consider the other’s point of view. Sadly, the equivalent of a child’s post-temper tantrum attitude was all I had left to hold onto.

And I held it (along with my tongue) fiercely.

It’s dumb, I know. But we’ve all done it, right? We think, they’ll “hear” us through our silence, dang it!

I don’t know about you, but this has never actually worked in my favor. When I get tired of the silent treatment one of two things happens:

1. The argument is still there waiting for us.
2. We ignore the issue altogether, allowing it to fester until it rears its ugly head again. (And y’all, it will.)

So what’s an angry spouse to do? First, let’s all just chill out. The same anger that leads me to silence can also lead me to say things I regret. Walking away, taking a break, getting a cool breath of fresh air is often all that’s needed to de-escalate the tension.

It’s not the same as the silent treatment or ignoring an argument, because our plan is to lead into this next step—coming back together.

When we have both calmed down, we talk about what happened. Like grown-ups. We can respectfully take turns listening and speaking. No, we might not always agree on a solution. But we can at least make a plan to resolve the tension or find a middle ground. And I’m okay with that. Because my relationship with my husband is more valuable than being right.

The silent treatment isn’t about holding my tongue. It’s about holding onto my pride.

Is your home emotionally healthy? Here are five ways to identify dysfunction and healthy ways to move forward.

The Good Stuff: For the anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God. (James 1:20)

Action Points: What topics need to be addressed that you have been avoiding because they lead to arguing? Pray together and ask God to show you both where you can find middle ground.

I Do Every Day Let’s Go Vertical! prayer guide

Visit the FamilyLife® Website
FamilyLife 728 banner

This content first appeared on Crosswalk.com and is used here with permission. To view the original visit: https://www.crosswalk.com/devotionals/momentstogether/moments-with-you-couples-devotional-9-or-16-555278.html
 

You might also be interested in:

Salem News Channel Today

Sponsored Links

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