5 Ways to Find Your New Rhythm in Retirement
Marriage
Audio By Carbonatix
4:00 AM on Wednesday, March 25
By Jennifer Waddle, Marriage
1. Reestablish Your Routines
My favorite part of the day is first thing in the morning when I’ve finished exercising, made a cup of coffee, and settled down for Bible study and prayer. I love the peaceful ambiance of the mountain view out my back window and the calm hush of my mind before work.
However, now that my husband is home, mornings aren’t as quiet as they used to be, and I’ve learned to reestablish my routine with a few minor changes. I now use AirPods to block out background noise and listen to instrumental worship music as I read. I sometimes go into another room or even on a walk to pray.
I respect the fact that my husband’s morning routine is different than mine, and over the last few months we’ve found our new rhythm while still being sensitive to each other’s habits. If you’re someone who loves routine, here are a few ideas to reestablish them in retirement:
-Wake up an hour earlier to enjoy your alone time.
-Move your daily routine to another location, such as a spare bedroom or back patio.
-Let your spouse know what routines are non-negotiable for you.
-Invite your spouse to join you or join them in a new habit.
Romans 12:18 says, “If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.” Finding a new, peaceful rhythm in retirement is possible, and it all depends on our willingness to work together to reestablish personal habits and routines.
Lord, help me work with my loved ones to maintain important routines while also adjusting my schedule to fit theirs, in Jesus’ name.
2. Communicate Your Needs
I’m not proud to admit this, but I’ve given my husband the silent treatment way too many times in our 34 years of marriage. He’s such a nice guy, I’m hesitant to bring up issues that are bothering me. But I also know how important it is to communicate my needs so I’m not expecting him to read my mind. Can you relate?
Letting your spouse know how they can support you is essential for finding your new rhythm in retirement. If working out every afternoon gives you energy and boosts your mood, put it on the calendar as a non-negotiable. If you’re introverted and thrive on time alone, schedule personal time and rest to refuel.
Along with communicating your needs, be attuned to the needs of your spouse. Be sure to be as supportive of them as they are of you. Having an “others” mindset can lead to a beautiful new rhythm in retirement.
Philippians 2:4 says, “Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others.”
Lord, make me aware of my spouse’s interests so that I can support them in honor of You, in Jesus’ name.
3. Share the Responsibilities
While retirement affords us to step away from traditional work schedules, there are still plenty of responsibilities that require attention. Whether it’s cooking, cleaning, yard work, or budgeting, learn to share the responsibilities in a new way and be willing to step outside your comfort zone.
When my husband finally retired, he was so happy, he offered to do the majority of cooking and house cleaning. While it was super sweet of him, he quickly realized cooking wasn’t his strong suit. He did, however, take on more of the household chores while I maintained the shopping and meal-prepping.
Consider these creative ways of sharing responsibilities:
-Have several meals per month delivered.
-Swap chores every other week.
-Minimize your belongings and declutter your space.
-Do a power hour of team cleaning every weekend.
-Honor the Sabbath and enjoy a day of rest. Use this time to reconnect with God and with each other.
Hebrews 10:24 says, “And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds.” This is a gentle reminder to encourage instead of criticize, which goes a long way in finding your new rhythm in retirement.
Lord, show us how to find our new rhythm by sharing responsibilities and working together, in Jesus’ name.
4. Try New Things
One of my husband’s retirement gifts was a set of quality kayaks. Now, keep in mind we’d never kayaked before, so I had no idea what to expect. After taking them out for the first time, however, we were hooked!
All the years of doing the same things, has pivoted into expanding our interests and discovering fun ways of spending time together. If you’re wondering how to navigate this retirement season, here are a list of new things to try:
-Start a side hustle
-Find a unique hobby
-Work on home and yard projects
-Travel locally and abroad
-Go on mission trips
-Volunteer in your community
-Lead or host a Bible study
1 Thessalonians 5:11 says, “Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing.” Build your relationship by trying new things and encouraging one another toward a life of adventure. You never know what new opportunities will arise.
Lord, please help us move out of our comfort zones and try new things. Thank You for wonderful opportunities and experiences, in Jesus’ name.
5. Lean into God
My husband and I have prayed together more than ever during this new season of retirement. Before, it seemed like we were two ships passing in the night, scarcely able to have a meal together. But now, we have plenty of time to pray for our loved ones, discuss Spiritual things, and lean into God as a couple.
The last thing you want during retirement is to grow further apart. This is the time to deepen your bond and grow in Spiritual maturity. Through the study of Scripture, healthy discussions, and lots of prayer, you can find a beautiful rhythm that honors God and each other.
Here are several ways to lean into God in retirement:
-Incorporate a daily couple’s devotion, such as The One Year Love Language Devotional
-Host a Bible study for retirees or pour into a young adults’ group
-Pray conversationally by letting the Holy Spirit guide you
-Listen to the Bible app as you cook together
1 Chronicles 16:11 says, “Seek the Lord and his strength; seek his presence continually!”
Retirement can be an exciting time for couples to reconnect, but it requires finding your new rhythm. Work together, pray together, and do life together as God intended. This might just be the best season yet!
Lord, as we enter this new chapter, help us lean into You and each other. Close any gaps we’ve allowed to form and bind us together in unity, in Jesus’ name. Amen.
