Is Polygamy Biblical?
Marriage
Audio By Carbonatix
4:00 AM on Tuesday, January 6
By Amanda Idleman, Marriage
A growing number of Americans (11%) believe that having an affair is morally acceptable, and even more (23%) believe that polygamy is okay, according to Gallup. This shift highlights a changing perspective on marriage and relationships in American culture, making it crucial to examine what the Bible actually teaches about polygamy amid increased media discussion and representation.
As the definition of marriage and what we consider a healthy relationship evolves, the discussion about what the Bible says about polygamy and how to apply that to our cultural norms becomes increasingly relevant.
It’s essential that, as we engage with this topic, we understand the distinction between the biblical record and what the Bible actually endorses. While the Bible describes polygamy, it consistently reveals God’s design for marriage as monogamous and shows the consequences of deviating from that design.
God’s Original Design for Marriage
Genesis 1:27-28 states, “So God created mankind in his own image, in the image of God he created them; male and female he created them. God blessed them and said to them, ‘Be fruitful and increase in number; fill the earth and subdue it. Rule over the fish in the sea and the birds in the sky and over every living creature that moves on the ground.’” God began the world with his best plan for companionship in place. He made one man and one woman to come together to complement one another, come together as one flesh, and to be fruitful and multiply.
Jesus affirms this design in Matthew 19:4-6, which says, “’Haven’t you read,’ he replied, ‘that at the beginning the Creator ‘made them male and female,’ and said, ‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh’? So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore, what God has joined together, let no one separate.’”
Jesus makes clear that marriage between one man and one woman is the original design for marriage. God sees the union of man and wife as a holy one and urges us not to separate unless there is abuse or abandonment (Isaiah 3:14-15), infidelity (Matthew 19:9), or if you are with an unbelieving partner who is prohibiting you from following God (1 Corinthians 7:15).
Polygamy in the Old Testament: Description, Not Prescription
There are several early examples of polygamy in the Bible. We reach about Lamech, who was the first man in the Bible to have two wives (Genesis 4:19). Abraham was married to Sarah, but also took Hagar as a wife after Sarah urged Abraham to sleep with her servant to produce an offspring. Jacob was married to both Leah and Rachel, but also had several concubines. These stories show that God never commands polygamy, and they face challenges in their relationships.
The Bible records human brokenness without approving it. Amazingly, God uses all of these people even though they deviated from his design for marriage. His grace is enough to work through despite our brokenness.
The Consequences of Polygamy in Scripture
As we read the biblical narrative, we can learn from the mistakes of those who lived long before us. In the stories where polygamy was the norm, we observe relational conflict and jealousy. Sarah abused Hagar so much that Hagar fled to the desert and only returned because God met her in her desperation (Genesis 16, 21).
Leah and Rachel struggled as they fought for the husband's attention. Jacob loved Rachel more, but was deceived into marrying Rachel first by the girl's father, as it was customary for the oldest to be married first. Leah produced more children, while Rachel struggled to conceive, leading to tension between the sisters. Over time, this led to favoritism and rivalry among Jacob’s sons (Genesis 29, 30, 35).
David and Solomon both married many women, often for political gain. We see that these marriages led to spiritual compromises (1 Kings 11:1–6). The Bible illustrates to us that polygamy consistently leads to division, pain, and disorder.
Mosaic Law and Polygamy: Regulation, Not Approval
The Law addressed polygamy to limit the harm that happens in our fallen world. These laws sought to protect women from the more destructive aspects of this cultural norm. Exodus 21:10 instructed, “If he marries another woman, he must not deprive the first one of her food, clothing, and marital rights.” These instructions were designed to ensure that women were not just used and then neglected. Deuteronomy 21:15-17 protects the rights of the offspring of these wives, as favoritism often led to one set of children being neglected.
Jesus addresses the heart of these instructions in Matthew 19:8, which says, “Jesus replied, 'Moses permitted you to divorce your wives because your hearts were hard. But it was not this way from the beginning.’” The laws addressed our hard hearts and offer protection and mercy when we are not able to follow God’s design for relationships. God’s original design for marriage as the union of one man and one woman remains the moral standard that the Bible puts in place for humanity.
New Testament Teaching on Marriage
Jesus restores God’s original intent for marriage in Matthew 19 as he urges us to honor the union of one man and one woman. As the church forms, elders are instructed to be “the husband of one wife” (1 Timothy 3:2, Titus 1:6).
Additionally, marriage becomes a picture of Christ and the Church. Ephesians 5:23-24 says, “For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. Now, as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.” Polygamy contradicts the gospel image. God is not divided in his love for the church. Our one true God has pledged his love and devotion to the church just as one man commits to his wife.
What the Bible Actually Teaches
Polygamy is present in scripture as the Bible accurately records the practices of the people who lived during its composition. The record of actions is not the approval of these practices. From the start of Creation, Monogamy is God’s design for marriage. One man is to leave his family and join to become one flesh for life whenever possible.
Unfortunately, human brokenness often makes it difficult to live out God’s design for our relationships. We see so many examples in history and in our culture of how romantic relationships become a breeding ground for sin and abuse. Thankfully, God’s story tells of the love that is to be on display in marriage but is actually fully realized through Jesus. He sacrificially loves the church and regards the Saints as his bride. We can see what complete and perfect love is through the cross. Jesus dies for us while we were still sinners, the ultimate act of selfless love!
This is the love that we aspire to embody in our marriages. While pologomy may be growing in popularity as our world increasingly views boundaries as a barrier to happiness, it's important that as Christ followers we are reminded that God’s design is not restrictive; it’s protective, life-giving, and ultimately points us towards the truth of the Gospel story. True love embraces boundaries and honors God’s design for life and for love.
Photo Credit: Image created using DALL.E 2024 AI technology and subsequently edited and reviewed by our editorial team.
Amanda Idleman is a writer whose passion is encouraging others to live joyfully. She writes devotions for Your Nightly Prayer, Crosswalk Couples Devotional, Your Daily Prayer, and more. She has work published with Her View from Home, on the MOPS Blog, and is a regular contributor for Crosswalk.com, Biblestudytools.com, and Christianity.com. She has most recently published a devotional, Comfort: A 30 Day Devotional Exploring God's Heart of Love for Mommas, alongside her husband’s companion devotional, Shepherd. You can find out more about Amanda on her Facebook Page or follow her on Instagram.
